Three Years Ago Today
There years ago today, I was acutely aware of what was going
on around me. Some people say it goes by fast, while others remark that
it seemed like only a dream. But not for me. Every breath,
every heart beat, every second slowly ticking. I don't know that in my
lifetime there will ever be a more important moment of my life. So
engrained are the details that there are times I am struck in awe at such a
day's magnificence. Indeed, there is no day worth more remembering than
this.
Three years ago today, I married her.
Every day I still marvel at the way we met. A path so laughably woven and
uncoordinated that only a master matchmaker could have overseen it's
creation. Indeed to believe that such an unfathomable union came about
all because of a blind date, one of the most ridiculous blind dates ever
imagined, is unbelievably extraordinary. Yet that is how this miraculous event
came to pass.
Three years ago today, I accepted my role in that miracle whose groundwork had
been laid many years before.
In full disclosure, I must admit that this was surely not my plan. Certainly
not while entertaining the idea of enlisting in the military, nor while I was
bouncing around higher education between all manner of majors. I would've never
thought a delayed graduation could've offered significant benefit over walking
earlier alongside all the friends and colleagues I had entered college
with. Singer and songwriter Andrew Peterson has a song that evokes a lot
of what I feel on this matter. Here are a few choice quotes from the
lyrics:
"But I don't remember anymore
Who I even was before
You filled me up with love
Filled me up with love
And you help me stand
So come on with the thunder clouds
Let the cold wind rail against us, let the rain come down
We can build a roof above us with the love we've found
We can stand our ground
So let the rain come down
Because love binds up what breaks in two
So keep my heart so close to you
And I'll fill you up with love
Fill you up with love
And I'll help you stand [...]
This is not what I was headed for when I began
This was not my plan
It's so much better than"
Three years ago today, I set forth on a plan that was better than all my failed
ones before.
As I funnel my emotions through my typing fingertips, I realize that no four
words have ever meant more to me. Many people like to elevate such golden
questions like "Will you marry me?", but beneath such lofty
evaluations I am left unfulfilled. As I look over the metaphysical horizon
of my life alongside her, I don't find a question to be the lingering presence
on my lips. No, as I survey the endless sea of possibilities, I am left
with nothing but awe at the gravity of the weight that stands behind us.
These immortal "Ebenezer"s leave lasting testament to the wonder of
what we have traversed, from where we originated, and to that which we have
accomplished. I need no destination, when I have the confidence of a
devout and holy guide as imparted to us by the story our lives enact.
Indeed, the words "three years ago today" speak volumes to me.
Volumes from a book crafted by a master artisan, filled with the beautiful
calligraphy of love, commitment, devotion, honesty, truth, and lastly
time. Time which builds and grows upon the roots of our history.
Three years ago today, I humbly formed a bond that grows in significance with
each passing day.
I will not forget this life-altering transition that transpired, nor will I
neglect the hands involved before it began. I realize wholeheartedly the
only credit to due my name to this elaborate design is my mere acceptance to
this agreement. All I had to do was make a choice.
Three years ago today, I choose a path that was better than any of my own
imagination, I announced my need for a savior and accepted that my own wisdom
and understanding was insufficient to prepare me for the future, I accepted my
role in a plan that was beyond anything I could dream or believe, and
ultimately I married someone that I adore so wholeheartedly and encompasses me
so rapturously and whose being is so indescribably incredible that no words yet
or will exist in any human lexicon to sufficiently distinguish the enormous
emotional reaction she so subtly evokes through her simple, mere, and continued
existence.
At the point my mind identifies all of these statements at the beginning of
saying "three years ago today," I have no escape but to ponder in
awe.
Sadly, I must bring this post to a close; indeed I could go on
pontificating its magnitude. Borrowing from Andrew Peterson again, I
leave you with this one line from the same song that also rings true.
"I'm saving my vacation time
For Disneyland"
Less than five weeks.